Obsessive rumination and comparing myself to others. Guilty.
Let me start with comparing myself to others. I think it is human to do this; but ultimately self-defeating, serving no good purpose.
It may look as though others have it easier, better; but there is really no way I can know what is going on in someone else's life. What they are going through, what they have been through. What they may have yet to come.
Suffice it to say, that if someone is here on Planet Earth (I like to call it Earth School) they are here to learn lessons and grow--otherwise they wouldn't be here. And they will have challenges at some point or another.
So comparing myself to others is useless. I need to concentrate on my own journey, my own lessons and stay focused on that.
As for excessive rumination and over-thinking...
I may think I'm getting to the bottom of something...but I'm not. And in the meantime, I'm not performing well. Ruminating interferes with concentration.
If I'm getting jolted by every pebble on the road, every negative comment someone makes, I'll never get anywhere. Happy people don't do this. They don't look for all the cracks, leaks and holes.
So stop doing this. How?
1) Become aware of my thoughts and take control of them. Distract myself with something positive. Write it out and leave it. Or talk with someone, and leave it.
If necessary, wear an elastic band around my wrist and snap it, when I find myself ruminating or comparing.
2) Take one small step towards solving the problem, if there actually is a problem.
3) Meditate. Meditation helps ground me and give me perspective. It helps me be less reactive.
4) Learn thought mastery through letting go of the small stuff. Will this matter in a year? Does this matter in the Universe? What is the lesson?
Becoming aware of my thoughts is key. Then use some of these tools--such as distraction and meditation--as practices towards feeling better. If I can stop thinking thoughts that undermine me, I will be happier.
No comments:
Post a Comment