Savouring Life's Joys

The next section in Lyubomirsky's book about enhancing happiness is a kind of mindfulness and gratitude mixture which extends to past and future, as well as the present.  Based on empirical research, here's how she presents it:

past - looking back on happy times, rekindling joy from good memories increases one's ability to buffer stress

present - hanging on to good feelings, appreciating the moment reduces depression, stress, guilt and shame

future - joyful anticipation, imagining future happy events, increases optimism

In DBT therapy there is a focus on mindfulness, staying in the moment--which I think is a skill we need to master first; but then I think there may be something to the activities the author suggests.

Again, I do find this a bit pollyanna, looking at the world with rose tinted glasses--something hard for me as a depressive realist to do.  I don't like the idea of fooling myself.  Deluding myself.

On the other hand, as happiness is a choice, why not choose happiness?  Let's assume for the moment that the world is equally full of negative and positive.  Would it hurt me to begin to focus on and notice the positive more than the negative?  Or at least begin to give it equal time?

Do I have to be constantly scanning the forest for predators?  Waiting for the next bad thing to happen?  Wanting someone to notice what went wrong, and fix the past?

Some activities that may enhance savouring = happiness:

Create a savouring album.  Something I have noticed about happyists--they always have photos and touchstones of happy past events around them.  Sea shells from a favorite beach.  Photos of their children graduating.

Something I did with my 78 year-old mother recently, was to put together a photo album of her travels.  She has always felt she has never been anywhere.  But when I pulled out all the photos and postcards, and assembled them together, even we as her children weren't aware of some of the places she had been.  Plus, she started to tell us stories about her experiences there.

Create a photo collage of your desired future.  This is an enjoyable thing to do.  I try to do one at least once a year.  If you hang it in a place where you can see it everyday it will increase the chances of you actualizing.

And finally, enjoy the moment.  Be grateful for things we take for granted--like hot water in your bath.  A warm, safe place to be.  Luxuriate in daily routines.  The smell of your coffee.  A bus/subway/car that takes you where you want to go. Nature.

Try to work in as much as you can that makes you happy, and savour it.