Normal Relationships
Before leaving the diagrams and observation of BPD relationship modalities, I think it would be constructive to see a similar diagram of how "normal" humans conduct their relationships.
In the detached mode, I am the centre of the Universe, stay away. I control this pain. Which, while effective in controlling the possibility of interactions which could result in rejection, leaves one disconnected, alone and empty.
In the emotionally enmeshed mode, everything and everyone is me. Which is an overwhelming, exhausting way to live. For me, it resulted in numerous breakdowns and emotional pain. The inability to complete things or last at almost anything I took on.
I can see why some researchers and therapists see narcissism and BPD as related. In both disorders, there is an imbalance or distortion between self and others.
Before leaving the diagrams and observation of BPD relationship modalities, I think it would be constructive to see a similar diagram of how "normal" humans conduct their relationships.
Source: MBT Training Workshop, Bateman & Fonagy, 2009
In this diagram we see how humans without BPD, construct and live their lives.
Different emotional weights, distinction of self and others; and the ability to reasonably negotiate the various divides.
What happens in BPD, is that there is no distinction. Others are either: Nothing that I am. Or... All that I am.
In both scenarios, "I am the centre of the Universe" apply.
In the detached mode, I am the centre of the Universe, stay away. I control this pain. Which, while effective in controlling the possibility of interactions which could result in rejection, leaves one disconnected, alone and empty.
In the emotionally enmeshed mode, everything and everyone is me. Which is an overwhelming, exhausting way to live. For me, it resulted in numerous breakdowns and emotional pain. The inability to complete things or last at almost anything I took on.
I can see why some researchers and therapists see narcissism and BPD as related. In both disorders, there is an imbalance or distortion between self and others.
No comments:
Post a Comment